Loving Presents

I had set my alarm for early. I had plans, you see. Big plans. Gigantic plans.

Plans that involved hair cuts and glasses repairs and, God help me, maybe even starting some Christmas shopping.

Even I can’t quite consider finding a gift for an anonymous person having started Christmas shopping.

Buying gifts, for me, is a lot like writing papers. Despite my revulsion for shopping in general, I get excited when I have the time and the energy to really search for important gifts, meaningful gifts. I like things that reflect both the giver (me) and the recipient (whoever) in every gift I buy. Perhaps it’s selfishness on my part, but I like the idea of someone knowing, beyond a shadow of a doubt, who gave them their gift. I don’t want mine to be lost in a sea of impersonal presents. I just can’t do it well when I have a billion at once.

So, this another year of my trying to throw the idea out there: Why don’t we pass on Christmas presents this year? We could adopt a family through the angel tree. We could go do something, somewhere, that didn’t involve a day that revolves around stuffing our faces with rich food and opening presents.

I knew it wouldn’t work. We’ve tried this in the past.

Even when my family members do not DO presents, they still do presents, and I hate it.

So I had plans. Big plans, all that jazz.

Only I woke up sick, my chest feeling as deflated as an inner tube underneath the wheel of a five ton dump truck, my throat burning and thick.

It could have been mistaken for love, or burning infatuation at any rate,  except for my nose.  Damn, my nose. My nose, crusted over like an ice floe that has been melted and re-frozen over a dozen or so millennia gave it all away.

I’m just grateful this pseudo-love had the good manners to grace my life AFTER the semester was over.

Timing, they say, is everything, and it’s time for me to go back to bed.

6 thoughts on “Loving Presents”

  1. I’ve miscalculated dramatically. I thought I could wait until payday to go shopping, but because payday is a work day, I’m left with approximately half an hours shopping time before Christmas when I actually have money.


    I’ll just make a big pie and buy some jumpers and look all forlorn when everyone gets me stuff much nicer than what I’ve given them.

    Baby in the family see. I get some benefits. That or I’ll try and do my Christmas shopping at work, and everyone’ll get a notebook and some colouring pencils.

    Actually, I like that idea.

    And I like pie. Ginger Wine Nut Roast Pie. It wouldn’t be Christmas without it (because otherwise I’d just end up watching my whole family scoff down turkey and bacon whilst I nibble a couple of vegetables and put on my forlorn face again.

    Still…it wouldn’t be Christmas without stress and forlornity.

    That’s not a word.


  2. I hope that you are feeling better today! I love the idea of a no present Christmas. Of course, the key is that everyone else has to play by the rules. Get your rest and get better.


  3. @ Alabaster: Good to see you, mate! Your “stress and forlornity” translates into two holidays: Stressgiving and Stressmas.

    @ tobeme: I think it’s a great idea, personally. If the holidays are supposed to be about celebrating and love and family and all that jazz, why do we have to exchange presents to accomplish that? It bugs me. I don’t need anything. I certainly don’t have room for anything that I want, so it’s sort of pointless. It’s not that I don’t want to just not GIVE presents, I don’t want to get them either.

    They say I’m scroogey.


  4. Good luck. There is no recipe, in fact, it didn’t really go according to plan. Basically just grind nuts and chuck stuff in. Caramalise red onions, chuck in allspice, nutmeg, balsamic, ginger wine, spicy stuff (we forgot mustard), garlic and all that jazz. Mix in the nuts, stir it up, put it in pastry and then work out what you did wrong and do it better next time.

    Vive le cookerie.


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