In the Beginning… (05 January 2008)

…there was insanity.

While I don’t understand Livejournal at all, it was incredibly important for me to start this blog today, 05 January 2008.

It’s a big day, you see.

Hi there. I’m a compulsive overeater. This isn’t a product of New Year’s resolutions since I’ve actually been attending [The Program] meetings since November of last year, (off and on, dependent on sickness and sleep). I have, however, officially begun my journey today, January 5, 2008, which is why it was important for me to start the blog today.

Good thing I’m not in a hurry or anything.

And I hear “OH NOES! Yet another fatblogger!” in my head even while I type that.

But I, as someone who must be beaten about the head with certain truths sometimes, struggled with the whole notion of “powerlessness” over food for just under two months.

How can I be powerless over food? Did God not instill me with free will? Are not free will and higher reason that which separate from, say, my cat, whose main purpose in life is to terrorize me and lick her own butt?

It was today, (or, more accurately in the wee hours of the morning) that I finally got it. Got it in that palm-to-forehead, how-could-I-not-have-seen-this-before sort of way.

And I got it.

Because of the nature of [The Program], and the reactions I’ve gathered from family members about my attendance of meetings, I’ve decided to start a completely separate, completely anonymous (insomuch as anything is truly anonymous on the internet) blog about that “return to sanity.”

I am sure that there will be huge obstacles and bumps along the way, but just the chance of the manageability that [The Program] promises will make it worth it many times over.

So here I start.

Originally posted 05 January 2008.

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